Lunchtime Capers
by TearShield Alchemist
Summary: The wierdest things happen at lunch... Lots of oneshots about the things that happen over lunch for our fave heroes! Rated T for mild swearing and mentions of yaoi...
1. Who Made Your Bento Box?

A/n: Based off a random fan art I found on Photo Bucket.

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_**WHO MADE YOUR BENTO BOX?**_

Naruto sat at his usual place with a pink wrapped bento box. He knew that it was the only thing left to wrap it up with, but why, in God's name, did it have to be so _pink_?

He watched as Sasuke found a seat close to his. Knowing the Sasuke-fangirls would've made his lunch today, he wondered who took on the _"sacred" _duty this time.

"Who made your bento box _today_?" the blonde boy asked his comrade.

Sasuke sighed, as thought trying to remember which one of his many fangirls had done it that day.

"Sakura…"

Naruto wished he hadn't asked.

"Who made yours dobe?" Sasuke asked nonchalantly, taking a bite from an onigiri.

"Iruka… sensei… teme" Naruto blushed. It had become fact he had moved into Iruka's, and Iruka insisted on making him lunch every single day. At home, Naruto called him Iruka-nii-san, but he had to choke out "sensei" even if it killed him around everyone else. No-one was allowed to know yet that Iruka had adopted him into his family.

"How… cute…" Sasuke said, smirking. Naruto knew he was getting the wrong idea about it. Now Naruto wanted to kill him. Many people thought he and Iruka were lovers and that was the reason… If only they knew Iruka was dating Ayame…

Before Naruto had noticed it, the Hyuuga prodigy had come over to grace them with his presence.

"Who made your bento box?" Sasuke asked, eyeing the prettily wrapped box Neji cradled in his arms. Neji immediately began blushing.

"Hi-Hinata…sama…" he stuttered. Sasuke's smirked became more evident.

"You two definitely are… close…" he commented, tasting more of Sakura's evidently store-bought lunch.

Neji sat beside Sasuke blushing into his food.

Minutes passed, and two more people moved to join them. Kiba sat at the other side of Naruto and Shikamaru sat next to Neji.

"Who made your bento boxes, guys?" Neji asked the two "new arrivals".

"My sister," Kiba said as he dug in.

"Chouji's mother made most of mine… but Ino and Temari made some extras…" Shikamaru held up two other bento boxes, beside the one he ate out of. Naruto eyed it with great interest.

"You seem so tame… Kiba… And Shikamaru… you have a tendency to choose violent women don't you?" Sasuke's smirk hadn't disappeared for a second, and now it was VERY wide.

Naruto and Neji held Kiba back, who was ready to pounce. Shikamaru just said "fighting is too bothersome" and went back to eating.

The group became silent again…

Then Gaara arrived.

"Who made your bento box?" Naruto felt like being the brave one, again.

"Rock Lee…"

Everyone's mouths dropped, even Sasuke's, who at the time had been drinking a glass of water.

This caused him to spurt it out everywhere, all over Shikamaru's _other_ lunches, and in Gaara's hair (a/n: how the hell did it get there?)

"What?" Gaara said as he took a place next to Kiba. Everyone had their eyes planted firmly on the red-head.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?" Sasuke yelled as he ran away to prepare for the apocalypse.

And so now, no one ever asks "who made your bento box?" for fear of learning things they didn't want to know.

At least… the guys didn't ask anymore…

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A/n: (insert evil laughter here) Next up is the girls! And then maybe some random side stories… Please review! And you can send ideas for forthcoming chapters!!!

TSA


	2. Who Made Your Bento Box Part II

A/n: Part two to what was started… those silly girls…  
Beware, Kakashi bashing evident!

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**_Who Made Your Bento Box? Part II_**

Sakura didn't expect to see all the guys squabbling like one **huge **married couple/group. Neither did she expect half of them to vomit once the great Subaku no Gaara joined the table. But even more less…

She expected Ino to sit with her at lunch…

"What do you want, Ino-pig?"

"I heard you made Sasuke-kun's lunch today… And by the way he's vomiting, you must've poisoned it!" Ino did her annoying little blonde laugh and went back to eating her… food?

"Who made your lunch today, Ino-pig? A boar?"

Ino almost leapt across the table to strangle the "lovely" rosette girl. Sadly, she didn't have the brainpower to do so.

"If you don't mind me saying so Sakura, Chouji's mother made it!" Ino said smugly-er.

Sakura almost choked on a grain of rice, as that was all she could eat since she was on the new and improved "SUPERMODEL DIET!"

Hinata decided at that time to sit there, with the two girls, and ease the tension.

"Who made your lunch Sakura?" Hinata asked, shyly… She didn't often sit with the two bitchiest girls in her old class… But, it couldn't be help, could it now? (A/n: Yes, it could've! –nods-)

Sakura blushed, as she showed the red wrapped bento box to Hinata.

"This was made by… Kakashi-sensei…"

Ino and Hinata stared. So did the boys from the other side of the room. Then the "all girls" table was protruded by boys. Hinata tried not to blush as she felt Naruto's hands on her shoulders, as he tried to talk to Sakura.

"Kakashi-sensei made that for you!?"

"Yes… you see he owed me for buying that pregnancy test…"

The boys (plus Ino and Hinata) gaped. Sakura figured she'd shut-up now as to not dig a deeper grave for herself and Kakashi.

Now who should happen to walk by the entire student faculty, but our _dear_ Kakashi-sensei?

The boys were about ready to kill him dead.

"Yo! What's with the glares?... And the growling?" Kakashi questioned stupidly as he backed away slowly from the students.

"What did you do to Sakura-chan!?" Naruto asked/yelled, loudly at that.

Kakashi was surprised they hadn't already realized.

"Sakura spent last night at my house… I'm sure you know what happened?"

If looks could kill Kakashi would be the deadest person alive (/n: OXYMORON!)

After spending half of their already shortened lunch hours bashing the living shit out of Kakashi, the guys joined the girls again, whose group had grown to include Temari and Tenten.

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(In a trash can, in a back alley) "Why did they beat me up because I was showing Sakura how to care for my nin-ken hounds while I was away?"

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"Who made your lunch, Temari-senpai?" Tenten asked, giggling. 

"No one in particular…"

"Please tell us!"

"Fine… It was… Gaara…"

All the boys turned to Gaara for the second time that day. Not only had they found out that guys were making his lunch, but that he made his own sisters lunch! He was probably even wearing an apron! And, god forbid, I bet it was pink… With floral patterns!

"Actually it has panda's all over it… It is Temari and my favourite one…"

"How the hell?"

"You were just voicing your ideas out loud again, Sasuke-kun"

Sasuke mentally scolded himself…

"Well, Tenten, I bet you'll tell us something not so weird, right?" Ino bellowed. Tenten nodded curtly.

"Kiba's dad made it for me!"

…

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A/n: OMG! You can bet that cause fainting and questions to be asked. Request ideas that I will make into a story! Even request pairings! And… you can request anything you want! I swear to do it, unless it is something absolutely downright revolting!  
Please R and R! 

TSA


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